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27 articles · LinkedIn
Promoted to Executive Director at JPMorgan
My promotion to Executive Director at JPM was officially announced today. What I feel most is gratitude.
How Do We Become
An entry from my journal, written in the back of a yellow cab: How do we become? Is becoming something that happens after we arrive — or does it happen earlier, before anything is resolved?
There Is No Trophy for Suffering
One of the most important things I learned this year is that there isn't a trophy for suffering. When some friends found out I have cancer, a few reacted. My answer was always the same: 'My shit didn't stop your shit.'
Five Things That Kept Three Years at JPMorgan Sustainable
After three years at JPMorgan, I have built a lot of things, worked with a lot of people, and I am still having a blast. Here are five things that have helped me navigate complex, matrixed environments.
A New Year Doesn't Fix Old Patterns
New Year's Eve is when old stories stop working and new stories begin again. I have said this line before, many times. And most years, nothing changed — because things do not change until they do.
Rule 62: Don't Take Yourself So Damn Seriously
As we approach the end of 2025, I encourage you to remember what Michael Easter calls Rule 62: Don't take yourself so damn seriously.
Commitment Fails When the Cost Hasn't Been Faced
Commitment fails when the agreement is made before the cost is faced. A lot of your energy goes into holding together arrangements you say are not permanent.
What Feels Like Collapse Is Frequently a Threshold
Water does not become steam by trying harder. It changes state when the conditions holding it together stop working. A lot of people are reading exhaustion as personal failure. It usually isn't.
Intentions Fail When They Live in Identity Instead of Behavior
I used to set intentions like everyone else. They were sincere, so I believed them. And then I would watch my behavior contradict them the moment pressure showed up. So I changed how I set them.
You Say You Want More. Your Decisions Say Otherwise.
People have started telling me they want more next year. More impact. More money. More freedom. Then they make decisions designed to keep everything exactly as it is.
Opportunity Doesn't Knock. It Whispers.
People say opportunity knocks. But I don't think it does. It whispers gently, usually while you're already distracted or doubting. Most people miss it.
The Stories We Tell Ourselves Sound So Reasonable We Forget They're Fiction
Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves sound so reasonable that we forget they're fiction. They start small enough: 'I should be further along.' And before we know it, they become architecture.
Tomorrow I'm Turning 42
Tomorrow, I'm turning 42. I spent my 41st year becoming a new person. The headline was getting cancer, which will rearrange your perspective quickly. So I'm just really feeling grateful for 42.
For Two Years, We've Written Our Goals on Post-it Notes
For the last two years, Arielle and I write down 3–5 goals on Post-it notes and stick them on the fridge. We don't track progress or remind each other. We just live with them.
Failure Is the Funniest Thing We Ever Made Sacred
Failure is the funniest thing we ever made sacred. There are seasons when the life you built starts to rattle. Everything still works. But something in the middle stops responding.
Market Research on the NYC Subway
I asked a young Black woman — a recent college grad — what she and her peers care about at work. The answer wasn't culture or perks.
The Dueling Selves
The hardest battle isn't work. It's inside you. One self tells you to stay safe. Your other self tells you to push harder. Both feel real. Both feel right. Both are wrong.
Why Winning Feels Like Oxygen — And Then Vanishes
Your brain runs on dopamine. Every time you hit a target, dopamine fires. But dopamine fades fast. It was never designed to keep you satisfied. It was designed to keep you chasing.
Motion Is the Sexiest Lie in Leadership
Motion feels real. Your body is moving, your calendar is full, energy is being spent. But here's what we forget: motion is not momentum. Momentum requires direction, force, intent.
Scarcity Doesn't Start in Your Bank Account. It Starts in Your Bones.
When your nervous system flips into fight-or-flight, everything feels scarce. Never enough time. Energy. Opportunities. Trust. So you grip harder. You say yes when you mean no.
We Are Not Scared of Failing. We Are Scared of Being Seen as Failing.
I thought I was the kind of bad-ass boss that got things done and didn't care what people thought of me. But when I looked closer, it wasn't failure that I feared. It was being seen in the middle of it.
Most People's Peace Isn't Peace at All
Most people's peace isn't peace at all. They've turned the volume down on living so they don't have to hear anything at all. The big moves get postponed. The sharp edges get sanded down.
Your Nervous System Is Your Board of Directors
When your nervous system is steady and flowing, your mind can explore futures that your body believes are possible. When it's chaotic, your options shrink to what feels safe in the moment.
Wait Until They See Me on a Good Day
Wait until they see me on a good day. They'll realize the bad days were mercy. Because the bad days were quiet. Even when my punches have nothing left, I'm still showing up.
The Four Self-Sabotage Patterns I See in Almost Everyone
I analyzed hundreds of small business owners and solopreneurs and saw the same self-sabotage patterns in 95% of the folks I've worked with. These four patterns explain why smart people stay stuck.
I Didn't Know How to Take a Vacation
I'm on vacation in the woods with my family this week. That might sound normal, but for years, I didn't know how to take a vacation. I could operate Fortune 100 strategy rooms, but I couldn't let someone else press 'send.'
Empathy Has Not Failed Us
Michael Ventura's latest piece in the NYT gives too much credit to bad actors who know exactly what they're doing. Of course empathy has a dark side. Everything powerful does.