Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves sound so reasonable that we forget they're fiction.
They start small enough.
"I should be further along." "I probably don't deserve that yet." "I'll start when things calm down."
And before we know it, they become architecture: quiet scaffolding around our days.
Most of these stories aren't dramatic — they're just inherited. A small page written from every moment we were told to shrink, be grateful, or wait our turn.
But stories like that are self-fulfilling, and they only function to keep us safe and small at the same time.
So I started practicing a gentler internal response when I can. It's not a pep talk or a correction.
Only an interruption, like a record scratch. Now, often, when I catch the old narration running through my head, I ask:
"Is this true?"
That single question became the foundation for one of my earliest coaching frameworks: REFRAME.
It's built on seven steps: Recall, Evaluate, Focus, Reconcile, Acceptance, Mend, and Elevate.
It's a process for separating what's real from what's remembered.
Because most of our self-doubt isn't rooted in the truth. It's a loop — an old emotional file that keeps auto-playing until you interrupt it.
When I started introducing this to clients, I found it got tricky. Sometimes the story isn't a lie. It's just what we believe.
Someone says, "I can't afford a coach," or "I don't have time for that class." And maybe that sounds true.
But what they really mean is, "I'm scared of what it would say about me if I could afford it, and still didn't follow through."
Which isn't deception as you and I know it. That's cognitive dissonance. That's the brain's way of keeping your self-image intact while quietly holding you back.
REFRAME is how you get out of that trap — because you slow the game down long enough to notice when fear is dressing up as logic.
When you're ready to rewrite your story, start with the bravest question:
Is this true?
And then give yourself permission to reframe the rest.